So many lament to me that they either seem to meet someone solid to date or someone exciting, elusive and erratic. It can seem like a standoff between a safety blanket versus wild chemistry. I have a strong opinion on this.
I simply do not believe in tradeoffs. In love, it does not have to be one or the other. Love knows no limited. You CAN have it all. If you find yourself dating either someone dull to you or someone exciting but unavailable, it is most likely that you’re simply not with your soulmate yet. Your soulmate will be someone with whom you have a solid relationship that remains exciting.
Here’s how to discern your best course to soulmate love:
1. If the exciting person you long for is not exhibiting similar enthusiasm for you, let go. Have faith that someone who is both fascinating and crazy over you is in your future. It’s much easier than banging your head against the wall of unavailability.
2. If you’re dating someone who seems solid, secure but a bit boring, don’t give up on it quite yet. Try doing some exciting things together, go deeper in conversation and then gauge if the relationship feels dynamic. If it is, the jury should remain out. Sometimes as people open up, the excitement factor heightens.
3. Remember that you never have to settle – for either someone who is boring OR unavailable. Your soulmate will offer you a safe, secure relationship that is also exciting. Be willing to hold out for THAT person. (S)he will be worth the wait.
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