Q: Kathryn, I’m just starting to date a guy, and he has been making some sexual innuendos from the beginning. On date #3 last Saturday, he asked me if I knew the “3 date rule” when I didn’t want to get hot-and-heavy.
I’m supposed to have sex with someone if we get to 3 dates?! That freaks me out. I like him but this is scaring me.
Is it true? Is there a 3 date rule?! I’m more conservative than that and need more time to warm up and make sure this is where I want to go. Is it wrong of me to want a commitment before getting that close?
A: No doubt the “3 date rule” was invented by someone looking for a booty call to up their odds of success – LOL!
But rest assured, there is no “3 date rule.” There’s not a “48 hour rule” either — that you have to wait to get in touch with someone after you get their info.
• There are no rules at all. Each of us has to date in a style that suits us. So, if you are conservative, then you can absolutely wait until you’re in a committed relationship (or even married) before going that far.
• Anyone who pulls a rule out to try & coerce you into doing something you’re not feeling is showing themselves in that moment. The true agenda comes out.
• If you like him and if he is your One, then he’ll wait and honor you. If he still pushes, I would eliminate him and know that someone who respects you and will honor your timing lies ahead. He’s be worth holding out for!
• No one — certainly not you — is desperate enough to compromise on something like this.
• You will not get what you want if you do give in. And you will be upset and let down.
If you are doing my work, then you are already engaging in a magnetization process that will not fail you. Have some patience and you will meet your One and the timing will unfold perfectly.
Let’s work on attracting the Real Deal rather than settling for so little. No more wasting your time!